Training Session #40- July 19: What would your future self say about you right now?

In 2013 I was diagnosed with sarcoidosis, an autoimmune disorder that chewed a hole in my cerebellum, atrophied various muscles, impaired my vision, balance, coordination and consequently stole my confidence and my ability to run. I have dedicated the summer of 2018 to regaining my strength, coordination, balance, and relearning how to run. I am participating in a 5k run on September 23rd in Philadelphia, Pennsylvania. This is my training journal.

This is my attempt to grow physically and mentally strong again.

Write on. Fight on.  

The previous training sessions can be found here, under “Fight on- Summer Training Log”


6:20 am- 6:55 am


Outdoor – 67 degrees

Training Maxim:

No hurry. No pause.

Training Performed:

35 minutes of walking- 1.5 miles


Getting out bed and training, even knowing tomorrow is a scheduled rest day.

Quote I’m Thinking About Today:

“The world breaks everyone, and afterward, many are strong at the broken places.” ~ Ernest Hemingway


When my alarm sounded at 5:45 am my first thoughts were excuses:

… but I’m tired.

… but my ankle is still tender from yesterday’s training.

… but I have a busy day today.

… but everyone in the house is still sleeping.

I turned off the alarm, stared at the ceiling fan and with my wife by my side warred with myself for almost 20 minutes

My present self wanted to sleep. He wanted the pillow and the soft sheets.

My future self wanted to lace up the sneakers and get outside and train.

I find myself divided like this a lot. The present self wants the relaxation. While the future self wants the tribulation.

With my wife still by my side and the ceiling fan still spinning,I took a deep breath and thought about climbing back into bed tonight.  Would I be the same person that woke up this morning or would I be a little stronger, a little more proud because I simply got out of bed and dedicated time to improving myself?

So I pulled myself out of bed, laced up my sneakers and stepped into the world at 6:30 this morning.

I didn’t want to.

But now, as I’m telling you this, I’m so glad I did.

Excerpt From The Previous Training Session- July 19: Are you your own worst enemy?

Do you struggle to get out you own way?

Today I did, very literally.  During training I kept kicking myself while I jogging. ‘

Below is a picture of my right ankle. (It’s not the prettiest ankle so please reserve all judgments.)

Notice on the medial malleolus (aka the bony knob that sticks out the side of your ankle) there is an open cut and the skin is irritated around the cut. This is where I kept kicking myself. Also, to the left of the cut is a four inch scar from reconstructive ankle surgery I had in 2013. And 5 years post-surgery, the skin around the scar is still sensitive which made the kicking a little more enjoyable.

So why when jogging today did my leg left foot keep kicking my right ankle?



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