Tag: health

The Danger of Not Telling Your Story


As a writer and a person with a degenerative brain condition, I often tumble into a state of what-will-they-say-about-me paranoia. A state where you hold your breath as you wrestle with the sinking feeling of eternal doom. What has helped me breathe and escape such doom is telling my story. I’ve learned that showing who […]

26 things I tell myself when I’m struggling


            To my friend, who thinks no one understands…we understand. “This too shall pass.” (King Solomon) “There bad moments. But there are no bad days.” “Beyond this mountain is another mountain.” (Haitian Proverb) “Sometimes it’s okay to be selfish.” “Somewhere, someone has endured much worse.” “Look hard enough until you […]

Having a hole in your brain isn’t all terrible. Learning to make the best of your misfortunes


Having a hole in your brain isn’t all terrible. Dare I say I’m grateful for having the opportunity to endured such a misfortune. For I’ve learned my attitude about such stark truth is simply a matter of perspective. Like this one time when I was having a PET scan– which tests for Multiple Sclersosis. I […]

Thoughts from a Waiting Room


I’m sitting in a waiting room, waiting to get a brain MRI when Jim Croce’s “I’ve Got a Name” begins playing over the ceiling speakers. Like the pine trees lining the winding road I got a name, I got a name Like the singing bird and the croaking toad I got a name, I got […]

The race I did not run.


On June 2nd I marked September 23rd on my calendar. On September 23rd I planned to run my first 5k. An act of defiance of sorts. Defying both body and brain. Proving that I could physically and mentally triumph over 5 years of living with cerebellar ataxia, sarcoidosis, nystagmas, enlarged lymph nodes, vertigo, muscle spasms, […]

Health Update: It's a migraine but it's complicated


On Monday a neurologist diagnosed me with a lingering migraine. Dizziness, nausea, stabbing headaches, sensitivity to light are symptoms aligned with a migraine. This is the first time I have been diagnosed with a migraine. The neurologist ordered some blood work and issued prescriptions for a brain MRI to see if the cerebellum has further […]

Vertigo: A Month Later Learning from defeat


On August 9th the living room would not stop spinning. Lying down, sitting or standing it doesn’t matter. It was as if I’m strapped in a Tilt-a-Whirl. Closing my eyes helps a little. The spinning gets to my stomach but I’m hungry but I don’t want to eat. I feel like throwing up. I double […]

A Health Update: Our Troubles Are Not Our Own


So my plan of running in a 5k in September has pulled a hamstring. I’m not feeling 90% (because I’ll never feel 100%) but at 90% I feel well enough to train. Currently, I’m feeling 75%. This week I saw a new primary doctor. After compressing five years of medical events into five minutes, I […]

“Dad, why does summer go so fast?” ...and then there was 7 days of summer left


My 10 year old daughter, Haley, looks up from her iPad, sighs, and asks, “Dad, why does summer go so fast?” I laugh and say, ” Sweetie, I’ve been try to figure that out my whole life.” Maybe I’m getting older, but summer seems to pass quicker each year. If you’re like me, you started […]

“We” Something we are all guilty of forgetting


Maybe it was a slip of the tongue. But when my wife was talking to a friend about my recent health troubles she explained that “we” had a flare up. The “we” was me. And it occurred to me that my wife was dealing with my troubles as much as I was. When we’re sick […]