In 2013 I was diagnosed with sarcoidosis, an autoimmune disorder that chewed a hole in my cerebellum, atrophied various muscles, impaired my vision, balance, coordination and consequently stole my ability to run. I have dedicated the summer of 2018 to regaining my strength, coordination, balance, and relearning how to run. I am participating in a 5k run on September 23rd in Philadelphia, Pennsylvania. This is my training journal. This is my attempt to grow physically strong again.

Write on. Fight on.  

The previous training sessions can be found here, under “Fight on- Summer Training Log”

Time:

7:01 am to 8:20 am

Conditions:

Indoor

Training Maxim:

No hurry. No pause.

Training Performed:

1 hour and 19 minutes of gym training. Including:

• Chest press 3 sets x 10 reps ea.- 90 lbs
• Shoulder press 3 reps x 10 reps ea.-70 lbs
• Inverted row 3 sets x 10 reps- 70 lbs
• Leg extensions 3 sets x 10 reps ea. leg- 30 lbs. right leg, 20 lbs. left leg
• Hamstring curl 3 sets x 10 reps ea. leg- 40 lbs. right leg, 30 lbs. left leg
• Leg press 3 sets x 10 reps ea leg- 60 lbs. right leg, 50 lbs. left leg
• 80 abdominal crunches
• 20 minutes of hill training on a recumbent bike

Accomplishment:

20 minutes of hill training at the end of training.

Quote I’m Thinking About Today:

“In some way suffering ceases to be suffering the moment it finds a meaning, such as the meaning of sacrifice.”~ Viktor Frankl, Man’s Search for Meaning 

Reflection:

For my friends, two in particular, who are going through real shit today. 

How to Deal with Anything:

1.Make a Declaration

You have a Problem. A Problem that has manifested into an uncomfortable truth.

When living with an uncomfortable truth– illness, addiction, financial hardship, depression, anxiety, confusion, damaged relationships– the first step is to make a declaration that exposes your wound.

I have____________.

I am _____________.

My relationship with _________ is ___________.

2. Ask a Question

Ask yourself–“So I am wounded, now what am I going to do about it?”

The declaration inspires acceptance. The question inspires action.

Take your time– the declaration isn’t easy. When the time is right, it has to be declared in your private heart before it can be announced publicly. And when declaring it to yourself, you have to declare with as much conviction and volume as if you where standing on stage, behind a microphone, in front of a stadium packed with a noisy audience.

Understand, the declaration is as much for you as it is for your audience. Your audience, like you, wants the truth. And when you demonstrate the strength to announce the truth, something magical happens. Your audience feels closer to you then ever before and your audience, in a way, will be seeing you for the first time.

The question, however, is for solely for you. “So I’m wounded, now what am I going to do about it?”

You can do two things:

1.Do nothing. Which most people do. Which I have done. Complain and moan and wish things were different and better but in the end we do nothing.

And by doing nothing the Problem gets bigger and stronger, as if the Problem found some steroids and joined a gym. Before long, the Problem is the biggest guy in the gym, walking sideways through doorjambs, grunting through reps, flexing and smiling at his muscles in the mirror, and intimidating you.

2.Take action. The amount of the action we take is inconsequential. The important thing is that you take action, which is defined by the audience as “having courage”. Even if you have terminal cancer, you still have the ability to do something. Write a letter. Have a talk. Sing. Smile. Hold a hand.

The important thing is that you do something. Doing nothing drains energy. Doing something creates energy. Energy that is essential to deal with the Problem.

Your Problems will die when your body dies. But your actions will outlive your body and shape the lives of the living. Your actions are how you will be remember.

So today, I implore you–do something.

And if you do–you’ll be able to deal with anything.

From The Previous Training Session- July 11: Vanity is a Lonely Road

Vanity is a dangerous motivator. We want to stride across the eyes of others looking confident, composed, and strong.

But as a runner, writer, and struggling human being, I know vanity is a lonely road. Vanity is inauthentic and creates insecurity.  Vanity always disturbs pace, form, and progress. Vanity tricks you into that thinking that joy is easily attained.