How Sarcoidosis Inspires Me to Be Creative Everyday

This article originally appeared on themighty.com.

After I was diagnosed with sarcoidosis I spent weeks circling the drain of self-pity.

I was convinced my problems were worse then anyone else’s. I blamed myself. I cursed God. When my wife tried to talk to me I was tight-lipped and curt. I was angry and afraid and spiteful.

Why was this happening to me? I believed I was too young, too important, too full of promise to be stricken with such a nasty, mysterious disease.

As a child I dreamed of becoming a writer. Sitting on the edge of my bed I would scratch down stories in marble notebook.  Stories about a superhero chicken, a baseball playing iguana and 15 year aerospace prodigy name Gunnar and his dog Comet chosen to lead a select group of teenage astronauts in a shuttle mission to Mars.

But then I grew up. I got my first job flipping hamburgers, bought a car,  tried to meet girls and stopped writing.

I went to college, became a teacher, meet a girl, got married, fathered three children, got sick and in one of the most important decisions of my life– started writing again.

“Creativity is a great motivator because it makes people interest in what they  are doing. Creativity gives hope that there can be a worthwhile idea. Creativity gives the possibility  of some sort of achievement to everyone. Creativity  makes life more fun and interesting.”- Edward de Bono

Sarcoid inspires me to write everyday. Though I can not predict the  course of my disease  I am responsible for every word I write. Words that when they are fastened and forged together, energize me with power and strength to fight my fickle disease.

If you are struggling with a chronic illness I challenge you to return to your childhood, to become a creator again. Creating is a profoundly constructive way to distance yourself from your pain, to remind you that you are stronger than you think you are.

Paint, draw, sculpt, build a bird house, make Christmas ornaments, restore an old car, get crazy with a crock pot. Create whatever makes your soul sing.

Despite popular belief, creating is not about money or fame. It never has been. It’s about totally losing yourself in a process until your self-pity is silenced, your spirit is renewed, and you’re afforded needed relief from the pains of living.

 

Leave comment

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked with *.